Down by the old blog hole

I am looking for a new colorist.

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 15:35:58 GMT

EDIT: I went and hired Nedroid!

Here's the post from Dr. McNinja.

As some of you already know, besides coloring Dr. McNinja, the lovely and talented Carly Monardo is the character and prop color key on the (best cartoon currently on TV) Venture Bros.

But it is with sadness that I tell you that the show is too demanding of her time for her to continue work as colorist on Dr. McNinja. It was either Doc or sleep that had to go. I think Carly chose wisely.

I'm really unhappy to see Carly go. She's immensely talented, and is fun and easy to work with. Thankfully I'll still see her every day, because we're getting married. Still, professionally, very sad. Carly will have her own goodbye to post to all of you once she's officially off the comic, but right now, we need to secure ourselves a new colorist.

OPEN CALL FOR COMIC COLORIST

The Adventures of Dr. McNinja is hiring a colorist for sequential pages. We obviously need somebody who knows what colors look pretty together, and how to arrange them, but of equal importance is the ability to work on a tight deadline. You must be able to color 3 comic pages a week, without fail or tardiness.

The contract will be for a single 25-45 page Dr. McNinja issue, and after that if it looks like you work well with us, and like the job, the contract will be renewed for future work.

The pages are published at drmcninja.com (go ahead and check there to see what sort of work this is), and later on they are collected and printed in trade paperbacks.

The pay is a flat $75 a page. Your work will be shown to an audience of over 100,000 people a day (and that's a conservative number), and we'll happily link to your website if you wish. The Adventures of Dr. McNinja has been favorably reviewed in such publications as The New York Post, The Washington Post, PC Magazine, .Net Magazine, Wizard Universe, and Wired, plus some bazillion blogs.

If you'd like to apply, please send links to samples of your work (attachments won't be opened) to chris@drmcninja.com with the subject "Colorist Application." Please have samples of colored sequential comic pages, and not just single illustrations. I'd like to choose somebody within the next couple of weeks. If I like your samples, there will be other details to go over, but if you have any questions, please feel free to ask them in your email.

Thank you very much,
Christopher Hastings
chris@drmcninja.com

Presidential Debate Drinking Game

Thu, 16 Oct 2008 19:05:27 GMT

Carly and I had some friends over yesterday to have dinner and watch the debate, and about an hour before it started we crafted a drinking game. Here is the list. I've italicized the ones that we did in fact have to drink on. I didn't feel very well by the end of the night.

Take a shot of vodka if:
that projector for the planetarium is mentioned.
someone says "that one."
McCain mentions Sarah Palin in a really creepy way. (we counted this one because he wasn't creepy about Sarah, but when he mentioned her husband he was)
Bill O'Reilly crashes through a window naked.
Bill Ayers is brought up.
Obama does a dick move. (We considered this possibly when Obama congratulated McCain on his state football team winning.)
someone says "socialism" (SO CLOSE)
the audience laughs
McCain's computer illiteracy is brought up.
one of the candidates pounds their fist on the table.
the debate ends.

Take a drink of beer if:
McCain says "my friends"
Obama says "more of the same"
either candidate spins their answer into a generic speech
either candidate blatently ignores the question
anyone says "maverick" (Shockingly, not!)
if someone specifically says "vietnam" or "P.O.W"
either candidate calls the other by his first name
someone says "middle class"
McCain says "here's what Senator Obama doesn't want you to know...'
someone makes the "Wall St./Main St." comparison
someone brings up General Petreyus
McCain says Obama can't admit he's wrong about Iraq
A candidate chuckles to themself.

I spent some time on this, so I might as well show it off.

Wed, 11 Jun 2008 16:35:37 GMT

My friend, Joe works for a law firm in DC, and they are having a company scavenger hunt for team building and all that. The theme is "dance" and one of the partners at the firm is a man named Rein. So his team came up with the name "Napoleon Reinamite" and wanted to have knockoff version of a Napoleon Dynamite shirt that has a series of Napoleon's dance moves on it, but with their boss's head photoshopped on.

Of course I thought "Joe, that will look terrible." but I stuck to the heart of the idea, and did this.

Okay fine I am twittering.

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 01:34:00 GMT

The Webcomics Weekly that convinced Dave Kellett convinced me too. I'll try it out a while before linking it off of Dr. McNinja. Here it is.

Awful

Wed, 09 Apr 2008 22:13:02 GMT

I was about to post an entry about how I thought it would be a neat idea to get story suggestions from the schizophrenic/drunk hobos who chat me up on the subway. (It only happened twice this week!) Instead of trying to ignore them, I could tell them what Dr. McNinja is about and see where they would go with it.

But whoops! I remembered that's exploitation!

A shark

Mon, 07 Apr 2008 03:57:57 GMT

I was drawing sharks yesterday, and one came out kinda nerdy looking.

McNinjas in Space

Wed, 16 Jan 2008 02:44:41 GMT

I was just poking through my computer, and found this, the cover to the 22 page comic I did my Sophomore year of college.

I forgot that I ALWAYS have drawn ninjas with that permanent black shadow on their face. Sometimes I joke to people about my character who is an electric ninja from space. The joke is that I'm totally serious.

A riddle!

Mon, 31 Dec 2007 16:58:38 GMT

If Chris Hastings is traveling in a train to New York from Baltimore at 85 mph, WHY does he know that a woman sitting in the same car as him is traveling to New York to get work done on her colon?

A: Because she has no concept of inappropriate conversation. And she can't control the volume of her voice.

Discoveries of the day

Sat, 29 Dec 2007 03:32:09 GMT

Kraft Macaroni and Cheese tastes fine without butter, I like coffee better with half and half instead of milk, and expensive ear buds are tooootally worth it.

Give the gift of Super Mario's Space Lungs (TM)

Wed, 26 Dec 2007 15:57:17 GMT

My brother and I both got each other Super Mario Galaxy for Christmas, without each other or anyone else knowing until the boxes were unwrapped.

Do you use Technorati, Michael? It's okay if you do.

Thu, 20 Dec 2007 17:48:32 GMT

Michael Showalter sat down next to me on the subway.

Again.

WEB cartoonist

Thu, 23 Aug 2007 15:08:38 GMT

I do not know the first thing about web development, and now that conventions are all done with, I've got some time to finally learn. Does anyone have any recommendations on how to educate myself to a decent competence in web design? Books? Tutorial websites? A school I can take a class or two at?

Why is Photoshop doing this (and more importantly how do I make it stop?)

Wed, 22 Aug 2007 19:51:42 GMT

Whenever I use the eyedropper tool to select a color, it changes the background color, and not the foreground color. Whyyyyyyy?

EDIT: I fixed it! I should have trusted Google to help me.

In the color pane (press F6) - the background box got accidentally picked.

I have thought of a new advertising slogan.

Tue, 14 Aug 2007 03:42:16 GMT

"If you don't want to be a sad sack, get Glad bags!"

PARKA YOU CAR?! (San Diego Photos)

Tue, 31 Jul 2007 18:52:48 GMT

I had an excellent time at the San Diego Comic Con with my Dayfree crew, selling my wares and signing my books. It was amazing to meet so many fans, and I liken the experience of drawing Dr. McNinja 250ish times over the course of the weekend much like grinding in an RPG. I honestly leveled up my drawing ability by doing so. It was strange.

It was really great to meet other cartoonists I admired and/or had only spoken to on the Interbutt. My one regret from the convention is not having or taking the time to hang out with everyone I wanted to.

But who cares?! Everyone's convention reports say all this crap! Let's look at the pictures I took! PARKA YOU CAAAAR?

Here's what my chunk of the Dayfree table looked like! That banner had the biggest Dr. McNinja I've ever seen.

I took ONE photo of cosplayers, and this was it. I'm sorry your dad dressed you up like that, kid.

Someone thought a bathroom stall was the internet!

We ordered two 3.5' pizzas. As I carried them in, I got the funniest reactions from strangers!

"Hey, who ordered two small pizzas!"
"Is that pizza big enough for you?!"
"PIZZA! PIZZA?! Anchovies?!"
"WHAOH PIZZA"
"Got any for me?"

You guys were so funny. I hate you.

R. Stevens and the giant robot.

From the same restaurant that brought you the hilarious valet sign and the 50 plus dinner party, it's POPE TABLE.

Chewbacca only travels by rickshaw.

Kris Straub is terrifying.

That's all!

Damn

Sun, 22 Jul 2007 17:25:53 GMT

Roy Sullivan was struck by lightning seven times in 30 years, and then he finally died when he shot himself.

I know we all get wacky spam and all, but...

Mon, 02 Jul 2007 13:14:13 GMT

"Hello my friend!

I am ready to kill myself and eat my dog, if medicine prices here (link) are bad.

Look, the site and call me 1-800 if its wrong...

My dog and I are still alive :)"

The joy of the stay at home cartoonist.

Tue, 26 Jun 2007 19:20:51 GMT

I spent most of today researching and sketching exploding trucks.

The Comic Book Challenge

Fri, 01 Jun 2007 21:59:34 GMT

Good or bad (omg they are vultures who will still your precious idea children), I'm sure everyone has heard plenty about Platinum's Comic Book Challenge. I thought it would be fun to enter, see if I can sell them an idea, get paid to make a book, maybe get a little bit of that magic hype machine behind me. Here's the sample page from my submission Monster Mart. Inks as usual by Kent Archer, colors by the lovely Carly Monardo.

Well that's a surprise

Mon, 07 May 2007 23:04:39 GMT

I just picked up a copy of the newest Dark Tower comic book (4 of 7), and I found that in the back there's a transcript of the Q&A from the Dark Tower panel at New York Comic Con. Here's the last bit.

Audience member: With the world of the Dark Tower being one where other stories like to find their way in, like Wizard of Oz and Harry Potter, can this new series see any of the Marvel Universe creeping it's way in?

King: What was your question? I'm sorry.

Audience member: Are there going to be any Marvel characters in the comics?

King: It's really sort of a group effort at this point. If they came up to me with that idea or if I came up with it, we might toss it in the mix, but don't mistake us for people who know where we're going.
[Audience Laugher]

That was me. My embarrassing interaction with Stephen King is my first appearance in a Marvel comic, credited as "Audience member." RADICAL.

How to make a HILARIOUS advertisement for your product or services.

Tue, 24 Apr 2007 16:42:51 GMT

1) Set the scene with something WACKY that's sort of related to your field. (If you could play to stereotypes you think you hope to market to, all the better)

a) Maybe a man gets frustrated with his computer and THROWS it out the WINDOW!

b) Maybe a woman is SO busy being a stay at home mom she has NO TIME TO COOK! A pizza delivery guy shows up, and sees THE WHOLE HOUSE IS FILLED WITH PIZZA BOXES. It's because she doesn't have time to cook.

c) Maybe a man is REALLY protective of his car so he puts like, CRAZY MEDIEVAL ARMOR ON IT, and a little kid would ride up on his tricycle to the armor car and the kid would be like "Wow." and the guy would be really proud of the job he did on his car.

d) Maybe a woman has trouble managing her weight! She tries all sorts of CRAZY diets! Like ALL GRAPEFRUIT or she lists to a coworker all the complicated restrictions she has for her meals. IT WOULD BE A LOT OF THEM AND IT WOULD BE PRETTY RIDICULOUS!

2) Have a narrator state "There's a better way." (This is vital.)

3) State your product or services and show them in action, making the troubled souls from the beginning of the commercial VISIBLY HAPPIER, BEAMING WITH JOY at how EASY and BETTER life is now!

a) Your antivirus software fixes the man's computer.

b) Your cleaning product saves SO much time, the woman can FINALLY have time to cook for her family!

c) The man can call your car insurance company anytime at all, 24/7! So you can get to work filing a claim to fix his wrecked car faster.

d) The woman bites into your delicious looking diet bar. Then a cute looking delivery guy walks by and says hi or something, and her and her coworker have a little giggle over it.

4) Another product shot, and then a quick "call back" to acknowledge how RIDIIIIIICULOUS the things in step 1 were now that we are all enlightened to your wonder product or wonder services.

a) The now happy man takes a moment from his computer bliss to smugly look over his shoulder into his bosses office, where we hear yelling and see a keyboard fly out the door. The happy man chuckles and shakes his head, then returns to work.

b) The family is eating their happy home cooked meal, and the pizza boy is peering in through the window, wondering why he is no longer loved or needed by this family.

c) At the mechanic where the man is getting his car fixed (there is no armor on it now), a mechanic finds a mace in the back seat and looks at it bewildered.

d) A fat dorky man in the office the women work at is looking in a diet book, puzzling over the restrictions of his new diet. He is startled by a diet bar landing in his lap, quickly followed by the giggling of the wiser, thinner, happier women.

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 03:38:55 GMT

I can't find my DC super hero stamps! Also, it has been one full year of blogging. Yaaay. I managed to actually keep a journal for longer than a month.

You stole our sandwiches.

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 02:43:49 GMT

David, Carly and I ordered sandwiches from Bagel Factory, and after waiting an hour without their arrival, I called to find out if there was a problem.

The delivery guy took the sandwiches to the wrong apartment, and the person who answered the door payed for the sandwiches and took them for himself.

Bulleted points.

Tue, 10 Apr 2007 15:59:19 GMT

I have been reading comics and not throwing them away since I could read, and only just YESTERDAY did I finally put together a "long box" to put them in. (Just one because most of my comics are at my parents house. But now that I can store them here I'll save them! I'LL SAVE YOU SPIDER-MAN! I'LL SAVE YOU RICHIE RICH!)
Walking past the local Dunkin' Donuts, I overheard an old woman declare to someone, "I am in a circle of protection. I can't let you talk to me with your evil plans."
I'm going to a free prescreening of Hot Fuzz tonight! YEEAAAH.
~~UPS lost a box of my t-shirts. Fuck~~ By total luck I caught the UPS guy, and he had the box! Yay!

Stop.

Thu, 05 Apr 2007 19:19:57 GMT

Collaborate, and listen. Ice is back with my POUND OF BACON.